It’s been many, many months since my last entry. What I have been up to? It’s more, what has happened since my last entry. Some pretty big life events happened in 2019. The first one is pretty big, but it’s too personal to speak in a public forum. We’ll call that information X for argument’s sake. Last spring, I was given a bit of information for me to absorb. I received the information very mature, handled it well and too much in shock to have any other emotions really. For some, it could turn their world completely upside down or have a grudge to hold on like a teenager for all entirety. Given my age and being a mother, I received the information with a different mental state and acknowledgment of the reasons behind it. Now, I cannot say for certain if I had received that message when I was, 16 or even 25. What I do know is, the timing of said information was perfect. I could have even lived my entire life not knowing. Because to me, it wasn’t life or death, it wasn’t something in my control. I am a sensitive person, very much so. My passion lives deep inside me. I was more worried about other parties involved then how it affected me. Why? Because it doesn’t change a thing for me. Since that moment, I have had many epiphanies. I didn’t know that’s what they were until I started seeing a therapist. My weekly appointment with my therapist has shown me more than I could have hoped. My take away from each session feels as if what I have been holding onto for so long is finally be channeled out. Opening my mind and eyes to what I have been feeling and thinking. I finally figured out how to describe my depression. I actually did this prior to my first appointment with my therapist which is what helped me to seek a therapist. I do not know what life is like to NOT be suffering from depression. I hope to find out what it is like.